Brain Remains


It’s the end of the week and time to clear the mind of the daily routine and enjoy the weekend. I’m trying to do that but a few things keep rattling around in my strange brain.

I get most of my writing kicks out of making things up, writing them down and then moving on. It’s the non-fiction truthiness of my life that also needs to jump onto the keys and out of my brain.

Sometimes they are little bits of communication, either in person or through reading.

Like the conversation with the prettiest little second grader you can ever imagine. She’s part of my “reading group” that takes up my Wednesday mornings. After six years of doing the reading tutoring I thought I heard everything, but this little gal cracked me up.

I asked her how old she was. She said, “I’m over seven but not yet eight.”
I said, “We’re almost the same age.” I wrote down a 7 and put a one next to it and said, “That’s my age and I’m just one more than seven.”
She said, “You’re not as old as my daddy. He’s 29.”
I came right back at her with, “He’s not as old as my mommy, she’s 99.”
And she looked up at me, smiled, and said, “My grandma is 200.”
I gave up and got on with the reading lesson. But I kept wondering what she must have looked like.
old-women-2


Germany got inside my brain this week.

I was looking at a statistic from the International Society of Aesthetic Plastic Surgery. It was a report on cosmetic surgical and non-surgical procedures for 2013. I’m sure it wouldn’t surprise you to know the United States was way out ahead in procedures. Here’s the Top Five:
USA                3,996,631
Brazil               2,141,257
Mexico            844,353
Germany         654,115
Spain               447,177

So none of that is surprising. BUT…if we break it down and just look at penis enlargements. Aha!  Germany’s fascination with Bratwurst starts to make sense. Here are the 2013 numbers on penis enlargement:
Iran                  12
USA                61
Brazil               219
Mexico            295
Spain               471
Germany         2786

 Would you like some mustard on that?Bratwursts

About bakoheat

Writer/Musician
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Brain Remains

  1. terryredman says:

    I like the epiphany that even in a tutoring session the opportunity exists for creative dialog. You and I will remember your dialog for a while and perhaps when the student is teaching her own daughter she will recall the conversation. I liked the post. TR

  2. That’s interesting about the enlargements. Just looked up average sizes by country, and Germany seems to be slightly larger than US. So no problems there. Go figure.

  3. Laughing uncontrollably. :0

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s