Too much turkey, football and crappy movies. My brain is a mass of nonsensical images, blank words and bloat. It’s hard to think about putting fingers to keys and saying something that makes sense.
The most sensible thing I have to say today is: BE CAREFUL WITH YOUR CREDIT CARD NUMBERS TODAY. ONLY BUY FROM KNOWN INTERNET SOURCES.
Sometimes I scan the news for ideas. Topics or characters that hold my attention long enough to research or write about. So what do I find with my Sunday news scan?
Well, in Florida (where else) there was a strange murder yesterday. Police were called to the scene where 42 year-old Charles Watkins had just murdered his mom. He told the police she had given his dad cancer and stolen his diamonds. So he shot her with his gun, then shot her with his bow and arrow and then stabbed her. She was slumped over dead in her chair with many arrows sticking out of her head.
What the hell am I supposed to say about that?
In Cherry Hills, New Jersey, scientists have discovered a new species of frog. It is officially called the Atlantic Coast Leopard Frog. The unusual thing about this new species is the frog does not croak. It groans and coughs. True.
IMAGE OF ATLANTIC COAST LEOPARD FROG
Back in Florida (where else) police in Tampa had reports of a very fast monkey running through yards. In the middle of the afternoon on Thanksgiving Day, the first phone call came in from a neighborhood near downtown Tampa, and an hour later another person said a monkey just tore through his yard. The second call was 12 miles away. Pretty fast monkey business.
Over in San Jose a Burger King customer left a back pack. An employee found it while getting ready to close and looked for an owner’s name inside it. All he found was $100,000 and a small amount of marijuana. I guess we know this because the employee didn’t keep it a secret.