Same Thing Only Different


I’ve lived in many cities in a few different states. I’ve always read a morning newspaper cover to cover (well, not the classifieds). When I read the local opinion page, especially the letters to the editor, I read the same identical letters in every locale. Those letters always talk about a “Good Samaritan” that returned a lost wallet, jumped a dead battery, changed a tire, gave directions, etc. The letters always end with the author stating they are so happy to be living in a place with such kind wonderful citizens.

good samaritan

And they are each right. I’ve found wonderful friends everywhere I’ve lived. Kind, thoughtful, helpful folks in all the corners of all the cities I was happy to be living in at the time.
Trust me, your city isn’t that “special city on the hill.”

Now that I got that out of my system, I have to say the cultural differences are a “whole nutha’ thing.”

The news, here in Indiana, is certainly different than my California news. The differences, like the weather, slaps one in the face upon crossing the State line.
Indiana snow storm

I boarded a plane last week in 75 degree weather. I took a few hours nap. I walked off the plane and saw my breath turn into ice crystals walking through the boarding tunnel. It was TWO below zero.

The joke in Indiana was always, “If you don’t like the weather, stick around it’ll change any minute now.”  This week the temps have pushed at 60 degrees.

Yesterday my brother and I were behind thirty people standing in line for frozen custard at a tiny little north-end burger/custard stand. The outside temperature was fifty four degrees in the sun. I was freezing in the shade with my long sleeve shirt, giving myself hell for not wearing my jacket. In front of me at least six gals, thank you very much, were in shorts and tank tops. Waiting for ice cream cones…brrrrr. They couldn’t believe the warm weather. I didn’t believe it.

The old adage—March comes in like a lion and out like a lamb—might be true, but it happens over and over throughout March… like a yo-yo.

The heavy snow, which looked like Antarctica as I flew across the state, has melted but last week while it was drifted high an Indiana farmer in a small town a few miles from here had a quick decision to make. This particular farmer found a new-born calf buried in the snow and near death. He picked up the calf and ran to his Jacuzzi and jumped in, clothes and all, holding the calf’s head above the water. After seeing some new life in the little critter, he took the calf into the house and wrapped it in electric blankets. The calf joined mamma this week as it warmed up.

The other culture shock is the Indiana legislature.  Last year it was a knock-down fight about gay marriage (a…duh…it’s Indiana) and now they are having a big “religious freedom” fight. While that sounds like a good thing, what it really does is give businesses the right to fire employees who are gay. It also gives business the right to refuse service to same-sex married couples. Gosh when you think about it, why serve people you’re backward religion says is going to hell. My religion hates southpaws and I abide by it. You left handers need not apply or try to buy.

I will say there may be a good law getting close to passing. If it does it will finally be LEGAL in Indiana to buy carry-out alcohol on SUNDAYS in liquor stores, grocery stores, convenience stores and drug stores. Cool.
Sunday Liquor Sales

Speaking of the legal scene, last spring while I was visiting a sheriff from a county south of my hometown had to resign when another counties’ drug task force discovered he had an EIGHT year relationship with a prostitute. When I made a return visit in October, the sheriff from the next county also had to resign when they found he had solicited that same prostitute on eight different occasions. I expect a shoot-out may be next.

Last week a State Representative apologized for sexting the very same Evansville, Indiana gal who cost Anthony Weiner his Congressional seat. This guy isn’t about to step down from his job. Probably because he had bigger balls than Wiener..

Gosh it’s good to be home. The people here are wonderful.

About bakoheat

Writer/Musician
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4 Responses to Same Thing Only Different

  1. Jack & Judy says:

    Good story, Dan! Welcome “home” for a cooling off period………You should have been here
    when we had the COLD weather!!!

  2. Robert D. Levinson says:

    Experienced the same weather here in Oklahoma, Dan. Crazy. The saying here is “If you don’t like the weather, wait a few hours.” When it comes to booze, it’s 3.2 beer unless you go to a state liquor store and then it’s at room temp. On Sunday, forget about it. Miss good old Bakersfield and my good friends still there!

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